Thursday, April 1, 2010

Making Porn with D&D Stars!

Beyond the Black Gate is pleased to announce it has joined forces with Rogue Pinky Productions in Kingsman, Alabama to make an exciting new line of explicit amateur erotic films!

So what, you ask?

These wild, steamy, direct-to-dvd releases feature only certified, veteran D&D players, all of whom have been participating in the fantastic role-play phenomenon since at least 1981! We here at Beyond the Black Gate and Rogue Pinky feel that who better could act out tales of raunchy abandon than experienced roleplayers who have been playing the parts of grumpy dwarves, ooh! mysterious! elves, and funny-voiced wizards for decades!


Three films are already in production:

The Forgotten Nipple of Tharizdun!

The Temple of Elemental Anal!

In the Dungeons of the Slave Lords!

With many more exciting titles to come!


So get together with 6-8 friends of 5-10th level, put on your hottest costumes, and lean back for the ride of your life!


Check out our full-color ad in the latest issue of Tell On!

Must be 18 or older to experience ride of your life.

22 comments:

  1. In the Dungeons of Slave Lords always did have a bit of that vibe, anyway, eh?

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  2. What about making a film called Tomb of Whores?

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  3. What's next, the Cock of Vecna? Think I might skip that one...

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  4. My loins are a tinglin' in anticipation.

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  5. Dude, I think you just won the intranets! ;D

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  6. Oh, what a sad tragic day we live in when the fine art of professional acting in pornography is thrown under the bus. What a blow to the porn industry! It is a slap in the face to the many memorable performances that have ever graced the exclusive video aisle in the back of most DVD rental stores.

    Pornographic acting is for REAL actors, not non-professional wannabes. Sure, they can can roll well enough in the table, but when it comes to the bedroom? Hah! Far from a Natural-20, I'll betcha'.

    I don't want my pornographic entertainment associated with a gaming hobby. That's just plain perverted. It's just NOT RIGHT! There are laws against this, aren't there? Think of what you are putting the professional porn actors through. How this must make them feel cheap.

    I'm going to have to start an organization to combat this travesty:

    Committee of United Mature Movie Watchers Against D&D

    Who will stand behind C.U.M.M.W.A.D.D. ?

    Ciao!
    Grendelwulf

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  7. White Plume Mountin'

    Fern October: In Fern O.

    Temple of Excremental Evil

    Inside Raven's Muff

    Womb of Horrors

    Wilderlands of Guy Fantasies

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  8. ..and these old school classics from
    G. Hairy Guyrash...

    The Pillage of Humlett
    Keep on the Border's Hands
    Bedding of the Hill Giant's Niece
    Glacial Lick of the Frost Giant's Jarl
    Balls of the Fire Giant King
    Descent Into the Depths of Bertha
    Shrine of the Kama-Sutra
    Vault of the Blow
    Drag Queen of the Demonweb Tits
    Lube of Horrors
    Expedition to the Bustier Peaks
    Lost Cleavage of Tsojcanth
    Forgotten Temple of Tharizkum
    Mordickanal's Fantastic Adventure
    Orgy of the Ape

    ...I really need to get outside more...

    Ciao!
    Grendelwulf

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  9. ...almost forgot these alternate levels of Castle Greyhump...

    XX1-Dungeonlube
    XX2-Laid Behind the Magic Mirror

    I'm goin' to hell, I know...

    Ciao!
    Grendelwulf

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  10. I think I just made some excremental evil from laughing so hard.

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  11. This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

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  12. Crammed Beyond the Magic Mirror

    XXXpedition to the Barrier Peaks

    and introducing... Onan the Barbarian, Michael More-Cock, and Lance Dragon.

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  13. Ironic that the chinese porn spammers would hit this post?

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  14. Wandering Pornstars.

    All-Natural 20s: Critical Tits.

    And then a third party releases the controversial Book of Unerotic Fantasy (compatible with Third Emission).

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  15. You're sick! You're disgusting! You're pissing me off that I didn't think of this first! :)

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  16. Vampire: The Ass-Parade (where the characters dress and act more or less like characters in the real Vampire).

    Beyond the Pink Gate.

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